We are deeply passionate about raising the child within us, and the child on the outside of us, responsibly. Our greatest move towards sincere responsibility on this planet comes from clearing the path we walk without putting our projections and pain onto those around us. The experience we are currently developing for those willing to step into the journey back to the heart serves in exactly this capacity.
Nearly 80–90% of our behaviours and beliefs are rooted in subconscious patterning. This means that most anything we choose to do is actually based not on what we have chosen for ourselves, but what we have told we are to be, in the systems within which we exist.
Our children are being challenged to step out of compliance with old paradigms as the playing field is widening, to decide what the path of their unique soul is, without being subject to having to be something that does not feel in alignment — it is our fearlessness that will either force them into a box, and give them a script to blindly follow due to our own fears of them stepping out, or allow them to explore the world with an open heart and open mind.
We often witness that those who are in greatest judgement of others stepping out stems from the inability for them to give themselves permission to do so, to be more open to the human experience more deeply connected as a result. We have a hard time simply letting old ‘rules’ go, as a result of our insecurities of whom we may be without the attachment and security to the ways of others. This could manifest is so many ways in the context of ourselves and our children. Perhaps we don’t allow ourselves to take a chance on pursuing a new career that really speaks to our heart, because our parents or peers feel it would be a bad decision for us. Maybe we tell our children that they need to abide by a specific way of life or religion that does not resonate with them at their core. Sometimes we may push them into extracurriculars or too many social events, because we feel the pressure from others to do so or simply the familiarity, rather than engaging in activity that is more meaningful. Perhaps we can’t let go of the illusion of perfectionism, so we dress ourselves up brilliantly and force smiles behind cameras so that we get that oh-so-perfect family photo to include on our next facebook post. Because it’s ‘always been done.’ Because there is seemingly no other way to live than in a very defined way that suits everyone but ourselves.
The coaching and personal development world has blown up over the past few decades, as we haven’t been given the tools to actually create the most ideal lives for ourselves, for fear of what the familial, cultural or societal systems may indebt us to. We are often taught to dim our light and play it safe, to keep those around us ‘safe’ too, for our aliveness and openness may have them feeling inadequate. Fortunately, we are no longer in the realm of following without question, to belong and be accepted. There is less and less of a ‘status quo’ as the world evolves, nor desire to be just that — the mediocre, the norm, the more predictable and less exploratory route. As much as we should know the truth of ourselves, most of us took on beliefs and practices that we may have never questioned, and thus, has not led to the truth that our hearts really want. We may find ourselves walking around uninspired, easily triggered, and caught up in the blame and shame game, not understanding why we can not forge deep, meaningful and authentic connection with ourselves and others, which is the basis of our own fulfillment. This is not the natural way of human existence. It is what we have created for ourselves, due to fear of what else could be.
It is time to release the patterning that keeps us hostage, and unavailable to all of the possibilities in the universe. The humanness of our existence — that of the full spectrum of feelings and experiences — is being sought more than ever before. Most all of us know there is something more — but can’t quite put a finger on it. Especially us parents.
It’s time to bridge this gap, by seeing the parallels in our lives and that of our children. We are starting to connect the dots where they haven’t been brought together before.
We will only love and grow with our children, as deeply as we are willing to love and grow all parts of ourselves.